How to Get Over a Relationship Break-up Fast!
Feel Good About Yourself and Your Future
There is a surprisingly powerful, self-help process that can work amazing changes in how you feel and think. And it often works in minutes. It can relieve feelings of anger, bitterness, hopelessness and depression. So, obviously youíre going to be feeling a lot more peaceful. I'm not only talking about getting over a breakup with your girlfriend, or boyfriend or fiance. I'm not just talking about getting over a divorce and feeling good about yourself and your future.
The truth is you can feel depressed and upset after any kind of relationship breakup or major change -- friends moving away, or when you leave "anything familiar" and have to move on to "something new and different." It might apply to leaving school or college. It could apply to leaving a job or circumstance. Most people don't enjoy leaving anything familiar. Change is often hard and uncomfortable. Facing The Great Unknown Future is often more stressful and unsettling than remaining in a doomed but familiar relationship, or continuing to work at a familiar job you hate. So, what I'm saying is, this process can relieve all sorts of negative feelings and thoughts. It can improve your outlook and help you feel good about yourself as God walks with you into tomorrow. And the change can happen faster than you would expect.
You can get over a relationship breakup or change of any kind in only a few days using a simple exercise called Emotional Freedom Techniques, best known as EFT. In fact, most people feel better in a couple hours, or even 30 minutes, after addressing their problems with EFT. It all depends on how many detailed issues are driving those bad feelings. If you want to stop reading and talk to me about your situation, you can contact me right now for a free initial
Compared to traditional counseling, which can last for weeks, months, or years, the EFT process is super-fast. Traditional counseling is like taking baby steps, while EFT is like racing along a highway in a speeding car. Results happen quickly.
EFT is a self-help process that goes far beyond what you expected to find. And if you're skeptical because it sounds like a bogus "quick fix," that's because your life-long belief has been that traditional counseling or rethinking your situation over a long period of time is the "only" way to get relief for emotional upset. Most psychologists and counselors believe that too. They became slaves to what their teachers taught them back in college, prisoners of their personal experience and preconceived notions like everybody else.
But authorities can be wrong, even though we donít expect them to be.
Consider this whole topic from a different perspective. Go back in time, back to the Good Old Days when most people still used horses and horse-drawn carriages as their means of transportation. Cars began to appear on the roads, but they were unfamiliar and controversial in the beginning. (In this illustration, cars = EFT, and horses = traditional counseling.) The transportation authorities of those times, or perhaps I should call them the ďauto mechanicsĒ of those days, were the horse doctors who kept the transportation in good health.
Just over the horizon loomed a society that would embrace automobiles and relegate horses to hobby status.
Here's my point:
Automobiles and horses are very different forms of "transportation." But when cars first came into use, do you think veterinarians were the best authorities to consult about automobiles? Think about it.
Professions have vested interests. What Iím suggesting by this illustration is that the mental health professionals, the counselors and psychologists whose careers have been consumed by the daily exercise of traditional counseling, or the psychs prescribing medication - all these professionals who know next to nothing about EFT, may not be interested in something thatís ďdifferentĒ from what they practice and are comfortable doing. (One caveat: If you or anyone you know is taking an antidepressant or other psychotropic drug, you may want to watch this important movie about mental health fraud.)
Many counselors who hear about EFT are often so skeptical that they choose not to check it out simply because the claims sound too good to be true. They're too comfortable with their old horses. Cars sound like a big risk.
After a breakup or divorce, or any major traumatic change in your life, your main problem is your "thought life" and how it affects your emotions. Believe it or not, what bothers you is not "what" happened, but the negative thoughts you fill your mind with "about" what happened.
Stay with me a moment and you'll be glad you did.
They say practice makes perfect, and you've become an expert at recycling your negative thinking. Disappointments replay in your head. You feel lost. Beautiful expectations about how you saw your future unfolding are now meaningless. You donít want those expectations to change. Circumstances HAVE changed. But you are irrationally holding on to meaningless hopes and dreams attached to a relationship that no longer exists. You keep replaying what might have been, if only. If only this, if only that. Isnít this true?
During a short EFT session I had with a distraught teenage boy whose girlfriend broke up with him, he said, "I don't want to get rid of my sadness, because after she's gone that's all I'll have left." Lots of people feel like that after a breakup. They feel like they have a "right" to feel sad. In my session with this boy, EFT erased his sadness in 2 or 3 minutes and he began smiling and talking happily about his plans for the summer. Iím serious here. In his particular case it worked that fast!
By now, you're probably wondering, "So, what is EFT if it's not counseling? And how will it help me get over my breakup? Well, it's pretty simple, really. If you havenít already read "What is EFT," do it now, then come back to read the rest of this page, or email me to set up a free initial phone consultation?
Now, let's say I asked you to make a list of 5 negative issues related to your breakup. Your list might look like this:
1.) I can't sleep at night because I keep thinking about her. (or him)
2.) I feel depressed all the time and just don't feel like doing anything I used
to have fun doing. And I have no energy.
3.) I feel like I'll never meet another person who is right for me. And I don't
really want to.
4.) I miss the companionship. I feel abandoned, like I can't trust anyone again.
5.) My depression is effecting my job and I'm afraid my boss might fire me.
Examine that list and you could probably make another one of very specific events that happened which relate to each of these more general topics. For instance, consider number one. You could dredge up a number of the thoughts you ponder as you lay in bed at night.
You might write down things like: a.) I lay awake remembering how we went to ___________and _______________. Or, " I lay awake thinking about the first day we met and how_____________________.
Using the EFT process, you can neutralize all your negative thoughts about "how" and "why" you feel depressed and come out feeling lighter and looking forward to a brighter future.
Does this sound like something you want to check out? Don't miss the chance to get started now. Email me some questions. Or schedule a free initial question and answer phone sesson. And here's something youíll appreciate. Letís say after an initial conversation you decide to try an EFT phone session. If we use EFT for your issues and you don't feel noticeably better by the end of the session, then the session is free. How many counselors give a guarantee like that?
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Other emotional and physical problems EFT can help.